Elephant jokes

Discussion in 'Clean Jokes' started by Sara-s, Aug 10, 2016.

  1. swarden43

    swarden43 "It's your shave. Enjoy it your way."©

    "Oh, look. Here come the elephants."

    What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming wearing sunglasses?
     
  2. Sara-s

    Sara-s This Pun for Hire

    Why are the elephants wearing sunglasses?
     
    Paul Turner likes this.
  3. swarden43

    swarden43 "It's your shave. Enjoy it your way."©

    He didn't say anything. They were incognito and he didn't recognize them.
     
  4. Sara-s

    Sara-s This Pun for Hire

    Where do elephants sit, when they go to bars?
     
  5. richgem

    richgem suffering from chronic clicker hand cramps

    anywhere they want.
     
  6. Paul Turner

    Paul Turner outside the quote(s) now

    Ron Ely, or the other actor?
     
  7. richgem

    richgem suffering from chronic clicker hand cramps

    Q: What happens when an elephant sits on a marshmellow?

    Show Spoiler
    A: He gets a mushy tushy.
     
  8. swarden43

    swarden43 "It's your shave. Enjoy it your way."©

    Maybe so, but it keeps him from falling into the hot cocoa.
     
    Slipperyjoe and richgem like this.
  9. richgem

    richgem suffering from chronic clicker hand cramps

    He'd really be in hot water then!
     
  10. wristwatchb

    wristwatchb wristwatch "danger" b

    Some vehicles don't have a trunk, but I guess it's irrelephant in this case.

    1.jpg
     
    BigMike, Slipperyjoe and richgem like this.
  11. Slipperyjoe

    Slipperyjoe Rusty Metal Tetanus

    Actually looks like they kinda stand and cosy up to the bar..bet they order the 'white elephant'...
    [​IMG]
     
  12. Paul Turner

    Paul Turner outside the quote(s) now

    A double-whammy from Charlie!!!
     
    wristwatchb likes this.
  13. Screwtape

    Screwtape A Shaving Butterfly

    Here's one mainly for the Canadians on the board:

    An international group of experts were asked to contribute essays to an anthology about varios aspects of the elephant.

    The Brit wrote about the elephant as a symbol of the old Imperial Raj.
    The Frenchman wrote about the love life of elephants.
    The German examined the history of the elephant in warfare.
    The American considered economies of scale in animals and whether the bigger elephant species were more successful.

    And then there was the Canadian's essay: The elephant - is it a provincial or federal responsibility?
     
    richgem likes this.
  14. Eeyore

    Eeyore Well-Known Member

    The elephant in the zoo had died, and his keeper was crying aloud. On a bystander asking whether he wasn't overdoing it a bit, he replied "you have no idea, I'm the one who has to bury him."
     
    BigMike and richgem like this.
  15. Sara-s

    Sara-s This Pun for Hire

    Why does an elephant have a trunk?
    Show Spoiler
    Because sometimes, a suitcase just won't so.
     
  16. richgem

    richgem suffering from chronic clicker hand cramps

    The airline lost his suitcase?
     
    Bama Samurai and Paul Turner like this.
  17. poppi

    poppi Well-Known Member

    Why did the elephant put straw on her head?

    Cuz she heard blondes have more fun.
     
    richgem likes this.
  18. Sara-s

    Sara-s This Pun for Hire

    How do you make an elephant float?
    Show Spoiler
    Mix 2 scoops of ice cream, soda water and an elephant.
     
  19. Paul Turner

    Paul Turner outside the quote(s) now

    I knew it had to pertain to ice cream :)
     
    Sara-s likes this.
  20. Bama Samurai

    Bama Samurai with Laser-like Focus

    Paul,

    How do you get an elephant into a Safeway grocery bag?
     

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