I don't mean to pun-ish anyone! If it makes you feel any better, I'm no good at football, either. I like to pun on the first down.
Three guys in a boat with four cigarettes and no matches or anything to light them with... what do they do? They throw one cigarette overboard and become a cigarette lighter... <insert rimshot here>
What do you call a wolf-man who sells plastic containers? Spoiler (Move your mouse to the spoiler area to reveal the content) Show Spoiler Hide Spoiler A tupperware-wolf
Hot cross puns? I think those are only on a knead to know basis. Sorry, just trying to get a rise out of you.