1. that's right, blame it on the bird
  2. There are horses on the track, now where is my orange juice?
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  3. I'm a little tall for my height.

    HERM
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  4. I'm not short: when I stand up my legs reach clear to the ground.
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  5. With or without heels on ? :rofl:
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  6. 1508485.gif
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  7. I wear heels to give me added stature.
  8. ya got me on that one Jimbo!!!! (why can't I guess these tricky ones?).
  9. You stole that line from Abraham Lincoln, dincha, dincha????
  10. I suspect it's older than him. The original is probably scrawled on a wall in Pompeii somewhere.
  11. Pilot - "Ladies and Gentlemen, we are ready for take off. Since we have a full payload and a short runway, I would like to ask all of you to lift your feet off the floor until we reach cruising altitude. And rest comfortably knowing that the maintenance of this aircraft was outsourced to the lowest possible bidder."
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  12. "Coach class passengers, thank you for flying Air Canada. You may now disembark from the plane through the rear exit."
    *****
    "First class passengers, please return to your seats and fasten your seatbelts. We will be landing in 5 minutes."
  13. The ships hung in mid air much the same way that bricks don't.

    Douglas Adams​
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  14. I haven't heard of any Bigfoot sightings recently. I hope he's okay.
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  15. Ogopogo thought he was more than just okay -- it thought he was delicious.
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  16. Chutney is an oft overlooked condiment at Easter.
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  17. The candy colored clown they call the sandman

    tiptoes to my room every night

    now he's doing five for B&E

    go to sleep everything is alright.
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  18. For a moment, nothing happened. Then, after a second or so, nothing continued to happen.


    Douglas Adams
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  19. If music be the food of love, I'll have another slice.
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