1. A bicycle can't stand alone; it is two tired. 2. A will is a dead giveaway. 3. Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana. 4. A backward poet writes inverse. 5. In a democracy it's your vote that counts; in feudalism, it's your Count that votes. 6. A chicken crossing the road: poultry in motion. 7. If you don't pay your exorcist you can get repossessed 8. With her marriage she got a new name and a dress. 9. Show me a piano falling down a mine shaft and I'll show you A-flat miner. 10. When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds. 11. Although the guy fell onto an upholstery machine he’s fully recovered.. 12. A grenade fell onto a kitchen floor in France; resulted in Linoleum Blownapart. 13. You are stuck with your debt if you can't budge it. 14. Local Area Network in Australia: The LAN down under. 15. He broke into song because he couldn't find the key. 16. A calendar's days are numbered. 17. A lot of money is tainted: 'Taint yours, and 'taint mine. 18. A boiled egg is hard to beat. 19. He had a photographic memory which was never developed. 20. A plateau is a high form of flattery. 21. The short fortuneteller who escaped from prison: a small medium at large. 22. Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end. 23. When you've seen one shopping center you've seen a mall. 24. If you jump off a Paris bridge, you are in Seine. 25. When she saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she'd dye. 26. Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead to know basis. 27. Santa's helpers are subordinate clauses. 28. Acupuncture: a jab well done. 29. Marathon runners with bad shoes suffer the agony of de feet.
A vulture was boarding a cross country flight, carrying two dead rabbits for a mid-flight snack. "Do you want to check those, sir?" the stewardess asked. "No thanks," the vulture said. "They're Carrion."
One day, Franz Kafka was in this bar raising a ruckus, yelling about his father. People are getting more and more put out, until finally the bartender sends him on his way. The next day, Antonin Dvorak punches somebody in the face for putting "The 1812 Overture" on the jukebox. Out he goes. A few days later, the police come by and arrest the bartender. One of the bar patrons leans over and asks his buddy "Hey, what'd he do?" His buddy answered "I heard he was bouncing Czechs..."
Klaus, I am really impressed with people who can speak multiple languages, but being able to appreciate puns and word plays in languages other than your native tongue must really indicate great linguistic abilities. I will always remember Ms. Moneypenny calling Mr. Bond a "Cunning Linguist!" :happy102
In Sweden we start learning English in school at the age of 7, so most people (I'd guess 90% or more) of people that are under 45 are more or less fluent in English, most would get those...
Hehe, thanks English has been a part of my life for around 15 years now and is something I don't regard as just being a foreign language, it has become some kind of hobby for me. Spending more than an hour each day on this board and others as well as watching every movie in its native language (if it's not English, German or Italian then I use subtitles ) certainly has played a role in learning some of the rather subtle aspects of languages (especially English) like puns, word plays and slangs. Hell, sometimes I even catch myself thinking thoughts in English rather than German :rofl
Wow! All my thoughts are in English! :happy102 Sorry! I don't mean to express arrogance in my ignorance. :rofl
My son goes to an all English High School, my wife works on a european basis with English as her language at work.. We don't speak English at home, but we just as well could.. We never turn on the subtitles on English language DVD's, read a lot of English books and magazines etc... I guess English is as big part of our daily life as Swedish is...
I come from a country that is supposed to be anglophone, but I never spoke a word of English until I moved to Canada. Even today, as I have stated a lot of times, my English speaking abilities are very weak, and I have to use a dictionary to do a lot of my posting. Besides Hebrew, I live in French, and for me, English is a very part-time language. However, slowly, slowly, I think my English is improving to the point where I can watch certain TV programs, and read an English newspaper, or magazine. My spoken English is however, is poor compared to Armand, my brother-in-law, or to Johan, Klaus, or Rene.
I guess in the near future we will all be speaking at least one of the following: English, Spanish, Chinese.
