Welcome Neal! I'm sure @BaylorGator will check in to say hello once the butler wakes him up, draws his bath, and sets out his electric hair curlers.
So I see some things never change. The super rich remain aloof from us common folk. I mean, I have to set out my OWN electric hair curlers. Although they do tend to burn my bald head!
If I may speak up about issues related to my time in the 30 D/C Presidential Palace, aka my apartment at the time, anyone who would have been able to resolve the "thread bloat" issue should be instantaneously Sainted, Knighted, Elected President and King, and hailed as the greatest genius to ever live. Honestly, it was more of trying to keep a fast frieght train going at an ever increasing speed on tracks that were neither wide enough nor secured. But it was one hell of a ride.
Well, to be fair, Randy has acquired a few more rings around his trunk since we last heard from him. It probably takes him longer to stir in the morning, and can you imagine the effort it takes him to look respectable?
Randy. Respectable. Let me ponder.................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................yeah I'm not seeing those two words working together. Semi-classy and glassy-eyed. Loveable. Yeah, those will work instead.
Well after digging out everything we own from storage I'm happy to say that my Russian Steel is still looking good. I also found Boris and Natasha camped out in the back of the storage lot. Wondered what happened to them. Here's the grand total blade count of the bulk packs I had all packed away Sharp Star - 1370 Voskhod - 900 Ladas - 100 Rapira Platinum Lux - 100 Rapira - 100 Rapira Swedish Supersteel - 50 Rapira Super Stainless - 50 Astra Superior Platinum - 90 Grand Total - 2760 Add the odds and ends from my shaving tackle box and who knows, really. With just the bulks, assuming 3 shaves per blade and that I resume shaving every day, I will not run out of blades for 22.68 years. Fellas, I think I'm set!
What’s up Neal! Good to hear from you, Comrade! I fired Jeeves, so getting up in the mornings has become burdensome nowadays. I also was convinced to convert my hair curlers to wind power in order to help protect the environment (you’re welcome), but the summer doldrums have made them almost useless lately. Thankfully I’ve come up with a solution… I mounted the wind turbine on top of my private jet and go really really fast to get the curlers heated up. It works great, but took some time to figure out. I’m looking at converting to hydroelectric, but getting the plane to fly underwater has been a challenge. Not to mention the humidity wreaks havoc on my dreads. I also find doing my hair in a low oxygen environment presents its own challenges. Anyway, all these problems have kept me out of the loop a bit.
Well you'll be happy to know I've recalled Ivan. I pulled him out of rehab to go on a search and destr.....ummmm....recon mission to find you. I managed to locate him just before he crossed into Florida wearing his Mickey Mouse ears as a disguise.. Great to hear from you. I won't be a stranger. Or, perhaps I should say, I won't be ANY stranger than I ever was.
Good to hear from you, Sir Randall, Esq. I'm glad to hear that your grooming habits are not contributing to climate change. Hope all is well with the family. See you at Mar-a-Lago this weekend.
It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of light, it was the season of darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair. Yet, for all the rhetoric, we managed a great shave.
The economy in the US must be tough, sorry to here you fired Jeeves. At least you are able to keep the jet. All you need for the underwater flight is some water wings.
