Limericks

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Bob strutted in his new leisure suit
That was made from the skin of a newt

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Bob strutted in his new leisure suit
That was made from the skin of a newt
His hairpiece was new
He bid his normal hair adieu

 

The Lincoln shot 'round the sharp curve
Driven by a small man of great nerve

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The tires started to burn

 

The Lincoln shot round the sharp curve
Driven by a small man of great nerve
He leaned into the turn
The tires started to burn
And proceded along like a tennis pro's serve

 

There was an old man with a beard

 

There was an old man with a beard
whom TSD saw and sneered

 

There was an old man with a beard
whom TSD saw and sneered
Someone PIF'd him a razor

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There was an old man with a beard
whom TSD saw and sneered
Someone PIFed him a razor
Then he became a razor gazer

 

There was an old man with a beard
whom TSD saw and sneered
Someone PIFed him a razor
Then he became a razor gazer
and no longer the geezer we feared.

 

There once was a nerd named Melvin

 

There once was a nerd named Melvin
Who only measured temperature in Kelvin

 

There once was a nerd named Melvin
Who only measured temperature in Kelvin
Once the Kelvin reached zero

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There once was a nerd named Melvin
Who only measured temperature in Kelvin
Once the Kelvin reached zero
The man was a hero

 

There once was a nerd named Melvin
Who only measured temperature in Kelvin
Once the Kelvin reached zero
The man was a hero
As he danced in his shoes that were Elvin.

 

There once was a dog with no tail.

 

There once was a dog with no tail
He was missing all four legs as well

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There once was a dog with no tail
He was missing all four legs as well
But boy he would squirm