Let's Write Some Limericks

A mechanic is just what you need
When your motor is lacking in speed

 

Bartlett's Quotations contain many fine wines
Best way to enjoy them is with a good fine wine

 

(question-are we sure Truman pronounced his last name like "ka POAT"?)

 

A mechanic is just what you need
When your motor is lacking in speed
So take your car to the shop

 

mechanic is just what you need
When your motor is lacking in speed
So take your car to the shop
(Service, not "chop")

 

A mechanic is just what you need
When your motor is lacking in speed
So take your car to the shop
(Service, not "chop")
When you need added speed from your steed.

My car's brake pads are now badly worn

 

My car's brake pads are now badly worn
Squealing so loud I can’t hear the horn

 

My car's brake pads are now badly worn
Squealing so loud I can’t hear the horn
On the pedal I trod

 

My car's brake pads are now badly worn
Squealing so loud I can’t hear the horn
On the pedal I trod
No! My brakes feel unshod

 

My car's brake pads are now badly worn
Squealing so loud I can’t hear the horn
On the pedal I trod
No! My brakes feel unshod
I fear the lines have been shorn


It's starting to snow quite a bit

 

It's starting to snow quite a bit
6 months on and off, I'm tired of it.

 

It's starting to snow quite a bit
6 months on and off, I'm tired of it.
But I've got bread and milk

 

It's starting to snow quite a bit
6 months on and off, I'm tired of it.
But I've got bread and milk
The draughts are blocked with silk

 

It's starting to snow quite a bit
6 months on and off, I'm tired of it.
But I've got bread and milk
The draughts are blocked with silk
All I have to do is stay inside and sit...and sit...and sit....

 

Summer tires skid badly on ice

 

Summer tires skid badly on ice
And the feeling that brings is simply not nice

 

Summer tires skid badly on ice
And the feeling that brings is simply not nice
Well, my insides quiver

 

Summer tires skid badly on ice
And the feeling that brings is simply not nice
Well, my insides quiver
With fear I shiver

 

Summer tires skid badly on ice
And the feeling that brings is simply not nice
Well, my insides quiver
With fear I shiver
And my bottom is as tight as a vise


Schools are closed again tomorrow

 

Schools are closed again tomorrow
It is even too cold for an Eskimo