May 1--Mix-It-Up-May
Shavette Shave #56--”Off with His Head!”
Gear
- Razor: “The Headsman” Shavette--I give nicknames to things that freak me out; it’s a coping mechanism
- Blade: GEM SS, non-coated (1)
- Brush: Semogue Boar
- Soap: Stirling Iced Pineapple & Texas on Fire (3 quarters IP to 1 quarter ToF)--my first mix-it-up for the month, and I thought smoked pineapple might be kind of pleasant. Now ToF really puts its foot in the door, so rather than a half-and-half, I thought I’d take it easy. Oddly enough, I could just barely smell it. Pretty nice. If I were to revisit this mix, I might even try ⅔ to ⅓ just to amp the smokiness a tad more
- Menthol: Stirling Frost Drops
- AS: Avon Wild Country
- Balm: Stirling Glacial Unscented
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About The Headsman
This holder is ½ inch PVC pipe that I heated with a hot air gun till the pipe could be flattened, cut roughly to shape, reheated again slightly to round out and shape, then sanded. This was in my GEM SE heyday, and was meant to hold a GEM blade for stropping. I naively thought my stropping would allow me to shave an entire month with a single blade. Oh, the savings I would enjoy! As a holder it did its job well enough, but the stropping was an abysmal failure. Abysmal.
I don’t know just when, but at one point, I looked at this holder and thought, “I wonder if you could shave with this?” I took a closer look and said, “No.”
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But when I heard folks alluding to May-hem as early as December, the thought kept coming back, so I lathered up my right cheek (on my
face--c’mon, now!) and gave it a whirl. It left me with no hair. It also left me with a half inch line that got redder and drippier. The experience answered my question: yes, I
could shave with it--but I shouldn’t.
Why No One Should Shave with The Headsman
As a shaver, The Headsman is about as poorly designed as possible. The PVC is light; it flexes; it holds the blade way too high and exposes half an inch of blade (which in turn makes the blade want to flex as well); it’s grabby unless the angle is so shallow that the holder is pressed firmly against your face; and finally, those corners on GEM blades… yeesh! Just look at them…
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...If there are barbershops in hell, this is what they are shaving those poor tormented souls with.
The Shave
As I mentioned earlier, I’ve been bitten by this horrible monster, so I took it slow, and I took it light. And a good thing, too. There were times when I could feel the corners scraping against my face, but quick course corrections saved me from any slices.
The initial plan: a simple WTG pass and call it good. It took a long time, but I got through it none the worse for wear. So, I talked myself into another pass, but swore that there was no way on earth I would go ATG--so of course my 2nd pass ended up ATG. I was confident going into that pass, but ironically got less and less confident the more successfully the shave went.
You should know this about me: when I was a kid, I’d jump into my grandmother’s pool at night, in the dark, alone. I would suddenly think about alligators or Jaws or The Creature from the Black Lagoon, and could
not get out of that pool fast enough. The closer to the wall I got, the more panicked and freaked out I’d get. And when there was only my ankle left in the pool, that’s when I knew,
knew, I was going to be dragged down to the bottom and killed.
Such is how that second pass went down.
I got two very minor weepers, but no slices from corners, and no need for the styptic that I had out, ready, and waiting. I am also universally at a DFS. Even the chin. The results are good, and there is very little irritation, but in the immortal words of Apollo Creed...
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Happy May 1st--enjoy what’s left of your Friday!
56 down, 44 to go!
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