Ya know you can't, but if ya could

The idea of a cell phone jammer got me thinking..

I know I can't, but if I could...
I'd hook up a switch under my dash board. Flipping that switch, without taking my foot off the gas, would do three things:
A. Light up the brake lights
2. Play the sound of screeching tires through a rear facing loud speaker
Third. Pour smoke out of the rear wheel wells

Boy howdy! That'll get them tailgaters to back off!!

You know you can't, but if you could..?

 

I've seen these programmable LED signs you can put in your window that can say words or put pictures like emojis on it.

If I could I'd have Magneto's super powers so I could pick cars up that we're in my way and move them.

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Yes, that I could do. I'm looking for things you would like to do, but legally and/or morally ya can't.

This is a just-for-fun thread.

 

As a truck driver, I'd like to follow the guy in the suit that's reading a newspaper, eating a bowl of cereal, talking on the cell phone and looking at his laptop to his office, and every time he reaches for a pen, stapler, etc, reach out and cut HIM off like he did me...

 

Sitting at a stop light...
Guy or gal flicks their cigarette butt out the window...
I'd love to jump out, pick it up, and flick it back into their car.

 

I can't, but if I could, I would eliminate Facebook. I think it is evil.

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Facebook has some good qualities. Twitter on the other hand...

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I agree. Some good qualities. Some lousy qualities.

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I would like to knock people off of jet skis with a potato gun when they buzz you while you are fishing.

 

I would like to catch some Northern dude and his wife out fishing in their boat and buzz them with my jet ski. I would check first with binoculars to make sure they didn't have a potato gun.

 

I have a friend that has one(a cell phone scrambler), and I got to play with it for a while. Very cool toy. He uses it all the time , in movies, restaurants, and for people driving next to him.

 

Roll Tide

 

I don't know if you remember the TV show Wings. But the character Roy once said "I have a switch under my dash to turn off my brake lights. Whenever someone is on my tail, I flip the switch, slam on the brakes, and cash a check".

 

I'd like to have a word with the guy who sprays screenwiper liquid the moment I'm overtaking, thus blinding my visor. Thanks for paying attention to motorcycle riders.

 

I'd like to get a bulldozer and rearrange all the parking lots in NJ to make them easier to navigate!
People of NJ, you know what I'm talking about!

 

Haaa, I've done that before, a couple of times. Just make sure you can back it up, if anything escalates.

 

I'd go back in time & tell many of my failing students EXACTLY why they flunked.

 

Now that's funny.

Herm

 

I would like to take a dump on my neighbors lawn, in full view of them, and the world.

 

I had a neighbor like that in the last house I lived in...