Let's Write Some Limericks

Watched the Derby yesterday
As still as a mouse the hat did stay
Rapt as horses ran fast
The hat joke came last
When the winner breezed past and my lid blew away.

I must get out today and rake the lawn.

 

I must get out today and rake the lawn
A little nap first I've been up since dawn

 

I must get out today and rake the lawn
A little nap first I've been up since dawn
And after the nap a beer or two

 

I must get out today and rake the lawn
A little nap first I've been up since dawn
And after the nap a beer or two
And a wee snack to settle the brew

 

The crows find the roadkill delightful
But traffic on the hiway is frightfull

 

The crows find the roadkill delightful
But traffic on the hiway is frightfull
All the vehicles ever on the go--
Let it flow, let it flow, let it flow

 

The crows find the roadkill delightful
But traffic on the hiway is frightfull
All the vehicles ever on the go--
Let it flow, let it flow, let it flow
“Cause we’re finding the lane on the right full.

I love watching cheap horror movies

 

I love watching cheap horror movies
And think Vincent Price was just groovy

 

I love watching cheap horror movies
And think Vincent Price was just groovy
He knew how to be scary

 

I love watching cheap horror movies
And think Vincent Price was just groovy
He knew how to be scary
As Egghead in Batman he lacked hair(y)

 

I love watching cheap horror movies
And think Vincent Price was just groovy
He knew how to be scary
As Egghead in Batman he lacked hair(y)
The headless horseman and the clip-clop hoovies

I once saw a movie in Nantucket

 

I once saw a movie in Nantucket
I ate my popcorn from a bucket

 

I once saw a movie in Nantucket
I ate mypopcornfrom a bucket
The screen soon went blank

 

I once saw a movie in Nantucket
I ate mypopcornfrom a bucket
The screen soon went blank
The projectionist forgot to crank

 

There once was a gouty old colonel
Who kept a risqué old journal

 

There once was a gouty old colonel
Who kept a risqué old journal
But records of his indiscretions

 

There once was a gouty old colonel
Who kept a risqué old journal
But records of his indiscretions
Were great blackmail directions

 

There once was a gouty old colonel
Who kept a risqué old journal
But records of his indiscretions
Were great blackmail directions
So the Colonel gave orders to burn all.

There once was a vampire named Ann