European union language

Discussion in 'Clean Jokes' started by Flatfish, Oct 31, 2011.

  1. Flatfish

    Flatfish Member

    My first post in ages. Nearly forgot how to log on.
    Everything seems to have changed.
    Anyway hope you like this post below.

    The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.

    As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English".

    In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c".. Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.

    There will be growing publik
    enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f".. This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.

    In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.

    Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.

    Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.

    By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".

    During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords
    kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.

    Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi TU understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.

    Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.
     
    Johnny, GDCarrington and PanChango like this.
  2. GDCarrington

    GDCarrington Burma Shave

  3. Williams Warrior

    Williams Warrior Well-Known Member

    Funny, I like it.:)
     
  4. stingraysrock

    stingraysrock PIF'd away his custom title

    Oh wow! Thank you so much for this full belly laugh!
     

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