Mary Jo scored a torch red T-Bird.
Others said with jealousy "Absurd!!!"
Breaking 90 in only third gear
She drove without fear
Singing "Fun Fun Fun" word for word.

Bill Jackson was a poor old schlub

Bill Jackson was a poor old schlub
On sports teams he was only a sub

Bill Jackson was a poor old schlub
On sports teams he was only a sub
He wore high-waisted pants

Bill Jackson was a poor old schlub
On sports teams he was only a sub
He wore high-waisted pants
No girls ever even glanced

Bill Jackson was a poor old schlub
On sports teams he was only a sub
He wore high-waisted pants
No girls ever even glanced
Except for the occasional snub

Miss Prim never said a swear word

Miss Prim never said a swear word
But still, she made her voice heard

Miss Prim never said a swear word
But still, she made her voice heard
Whenever she got agitated

Miss Prim never said a swear word
But still, she made her voice heard
Whenever she got agitated
Her response was carefully regulated

Miss Prim never said a swear word
But still, she made her voice heard
Whenever she got agitated
Her response was carefully regulated
So she'd silently flip you the bird.

Bill Jackson was known to swill beer

Bill Jackson was known to swill beer
While riding shotgun on a John Deer

Bill Jackson was known to swill beer
While riding shotgun on a John Deere
One night while chugging Bud Lite

Bill Jackson was known to swill beer
While riding shotgun on a John Deere
One night while chugging Bud Lite
He hung a left instead of a right

Bill Jackson was known to swill beer
While riding shotgun on a John Deere
One night while chugging Bud Lite
He hung a left instead of a right
And that’s why he’s no longer here.

there once was a man from nantucket

there once was a man from Nantucket
Couldn’t carry a tune in a bucket.

there once was a man from Nantucket
Couldn’t carry a tune in a bucket.
he said with a smile

too slow