Twas once a Squirrel from the North Pole

‘Twas once a Squirrel from the North Pole
Who hid his acorns in a hole

‘Twas once a Squirrel from the North Pole
Who hid his acorns in a hole
When they froze in the ice

‘Twas once a Squirrel from the North Pole
Who hid his acorns in a hole
When they froze in the ice
He didn't think twice

Twas once a Squirrel from the North Pole
Who hid his acorns in a hole
When they froze in the ice
He didn't think twice
and lit up Frosty’s two eyes of coal

Twas once a Squirrel from the North Pole
Who hid his acorns in a hole
When they froze in the ice
He didn't think twice
‘Cause digging them up was his goal.

There once was a big teddy bear...

Who accidentally got sprayed with some Nair

I just remembered that a couple years ago I wrote a bunch of Halloween limericks about movie monsters.

I have an uncle who has gone by his nickname all his life, not his real name. His nickname? Bard.

There once was a big teddy bear...
Who accidentally got sprayed with some Nair
He was mad as can be

There once was a big teddy bear
Who accidentally got sprayed with some Nair.
He was mad as can be,
A hairless grizzly,

There once was a big teddy bear
Who accidentally got sprayed with some Nair.
He was mad as can be,
A hairless grizzly,
who now was a big teddy bare!

Sam reached down into his pocket

Sam reached down into his pocket
And grabbed his Maltese to walk it.

Sam reached down into his pocket
To search for his picture of Davy Crockett

Sam reached down into his pocket
And grabbed his Maltese to walk it.
But his pocket was full

And that ain't no bull

Sam reached down into his pocket
And grabbed his Maltese to walk it.
But his pocket was full
And that ain't no bull
so why did he have some girl's locket?

There once was an old man called Sven