LOL Cats, Demotivationals, etc.

Discussion in 'Clean Jokes' started by richgem, Jun 18, 2012.

  1. Hembree

    Hembree Not as pretty smelling

    brit likes this.
  2. Erik Redd

    Erik Redd Lizabeth, baby, I'm comin' to join ya.

  3. Edison Carter

    Edison Carter Well-Known Member

    Could've had that discussion at home..... Come to think of it....
     
    Erik Redd and Hembree like this.
  4. RyX

    RyX DoH!

    If you haven't yet, visit YouTube and look for
    "SEAGULLS! (Stop It Now)" -- A Bad Lip Reading of The Empire Strikes Back" (Link HERE)
    "Bushes of Love" is entertaining, too.

     
    brit, AGHisBBS, Hembree and 3 others like this.
  5. richgem

    richgem suffering from chronic clicker hand cramps

    @Erik Redd ... maybe you want to rethink that day job?

    [​IMG]
     
    RyX, brit, AGHisBBS and 5 others like this.
  6. Erik Redd

    Erik Redd Lizabeth, baby, I'm comin' to join ya.

    If you've got it, flaunt it.
     
    RyX, brit, AGHisBBS and 2 others like this.
  7. Erik Redd

    Erik Redd Lizabeth, baby, I'm comin' to join ya.

    A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary surgeon. As she laid her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird's chest.

    After a moment or two, the vet shook his head and sadly said, "I'm sorry, your duck, Cuddles, has passed away."

    The distressed woman wailed, "Are you sure?"

    "Yes, I am sure. Your duck is dead," replied the vet..

    "How can you be so sure?" she protested.. "I mean you haven't done any testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma or something."

    The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room. He returned a few minutes later with a black Labrador Retriever. As the duck's owner looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front paws on the examination table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom. He then looked up at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head.

    The vet patted the dog on the head and took it out of the room. A few minutes later he returned with a cat. The cat jumped on the table and also delicately sniffed the bird from head to foot. The cat sat back on its haunches, shook its head, meowed softly and strolled out of the room.

    The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry, but as I said, this is most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck."

    The vet turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys and produced a bill, which he handed to the woman..

    The duck's owner, still in shock, took the bill. "$1,500!" she cried,"$1,500 just to tell me my duck is dead!"

    The vet shrugged, "I'm sorry. If you had just taken my word for it, the bill would have been $20, but with the Lab Report and the Cat Scan, it's now $1,500."
     
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  8. richgem

    richgem suffering from chronic clicker hand cramps

  9. richgem

    richgem suffering from chronic clicker hand cramps

  10. Sara-s

    Sara-s This Pun for Hire

    Noooooooooo!!!!!!!
     
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  11. richgem

    richgem suffering from chronic clicker hand cramps

    There's one black ... erm sheep?... in every family.
     
    brit likes this.
  12. richgem

    richgem suffering from chronic clicker hand cramps

    Is next... svimwear....

    [​IMG]
     
  13. brit

    brit in a box

    :eek:
     
    BigMark83 likes this.
  14. Erik Redd

    Erik Redd Lizabeth, baby, I'm comin' to join ya.

  15. Erik Redd

    Erik Redd Lizabeth, baby, I'm comin' to join ya.

  16. richgem

    richgem suffering from chronic clicker hand cramps

  17. richgem

    richgem suffering from chronic clicker hand cramps

  18. richgem

    richgem suffering from chronic clicker hand cramps

    Meanwhile... in Canada...

    [​IMG]
     
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  19. richgem

    richgem suffering from chronic clicker hand cramps

    And in Nebraska....

    [​IMG]
     
    Last edited: Apr 25, 2019
  20. richgem

    richgem suffering from chronic clicker hand cramps

    Especially for @macaronus and @Eeyore but @Sara-s and others might like it too.
    IMG-20190425-WA0000.jpg


    Carrot 1: What are you reading?
    Carrot 2: A horror story.

    Book title: Vegetarian Cookbook.

    :eek:
     
    RyX, Eeyore, AGHisBBS and 6 others like this.

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